Good agreements make good friends. What to do if a couple of months have passed since the moment of “loan”, and a friend is in no hurry to give back what he has taken “until the next salary”? No panic! Everything can be fixed without losing a friend.
Who Is Lending Money to Whom?
There are always those who help their loved ones with finances and those who willingly borrow money.
When requesting to borrow money, 11% of people in Western countries turn to relatives, 7% try to borrow from friends, and only 1% borrow from colleagues. Almost every fifth of this population in a cash-strapped situation takes a loan from a bank, and 60% of respondents try not to borrow money under any circumstances.
The statistics are also interesting in relation to those who lend money. 22% are willing to help relatives, 21% friends and 9% colleagues. However, the amounts differ in each case.
The average amount that people are willing to lend to relatives is around $100 to $200, to a friend, $100 to $120, and to a colleague, $50 to $60.
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And, of course, every borrower hopes that they will deal with their kind soul in good conscience and repay the debt on time. And sometimes they’re wrong.
Debts Will Remain for Three Years
The statistics of the American Analytical Center claim that for some people, debts to the bank, friends, colleagues and relatives are not at all equivalent. While some must definitely return what they have taken, others can be “forgotten”.
More than half of Americans consider it right to return a debt to everyone from whom it was taken. A third of the respondents admit ignoring the debt to the bank, but are in favor of the mandatory return of the borrowed to friends and relatives. And only 2% are sure that only the debt taken from the bank can be considered real, and the rest is not necessary to return.
How to Ask For a Refund Without Offending a Person
Before moving on to specific recommendations, you need to clearly male understand your conditions. Asking for your money back is not at all embarrassing, but correct and expected.
How to Do It In Order to Get What You Want As Soon As Possible?
Tip 1: Don’t Wait Three Years
The more time passes since you lent money to someone, the less likely you are to repay the debt. The one who asks can simply forget that he should and continue to live his life, and you will accumulate irritation and resentment.
Ask for a refund as soon as the terms of the agreement expire. If you asked for the amount before the salary, remind at the end of the month. Don’t worry about having to remind the borrower because you want your money back. And you have every right to do so.
Tip 2: Try to Be Funny
If you approach the repayment of a debt with a sense of humor, then there will be no awkwardness, and the borrower will return what was taken in a good mood.
Try texting or emailing him. Announce the amount that was taken from you and say that you are waiting for a refund in the near future.
Tip 3: Just Ask For a Refund
Some people literally get hung up on the situation. “What will my friend think of me if I ask him for money now?”, “But he won’t be offended and will continue to be friends with me?”, “Maybe now is not the right time?”
Stop thinking about it and regain your peace of mind just by reminding yourself of duty.
Express your request clearly, specifically and unambiguously. Indicate the amount and terms in which you expect the repayment of the debt. Be respectful in your address.
Tip 4: Don’t Settle for Passive Waiting
If for some reason at this very moment the borrower cannot repay the debt, specify specific dates. Otherwise, you risk waiting for your money for weeks, months or even years.
If the debt was taken a long time ago, invite your friend to talk about it. Organize a confidential conversation and talk about the fact that you also need money. You are planning a serious purchase, you want to relax with your loved ones, or you are planning home renovations. There are always situations when money is needed. Feel free to share one of them.
Keep boundaries. Be persistent in your request, but not so much that you become intrusive or aggressive. Give the person the opportunity to explain their situation and offer options for repaying the debt.
Tip 5: Make It Easy to Get a Refund
It happens that the borrower lives in different cities, rarely see each other or intersect only in some institution. In this case, even if you want the debt to be paid, it can be difficult to adjust and catch the moment favorable for this.
Always stipulate how he can get you your money back. Perhaps he can transfer to a card or electronic wallet, leave the amount to a mutual friend, or make a postal order. Agree on an acceptable option and leave all the necessary data.
Tip 6: Skip Spending Plans
If a friend who has borrowed money behaves as if nothing had happened, but is in no hurry to repay debts, refuse to spend time with him if money is required for this.
Argue your refusal to go to the movies, get out into the countryside or bowling alley with a difficult financial situation. Perhaps a friend will take the hint and pay off his debt.
Tip 7: Ask For a Refund of Some of Your Expenses
If the loan was taken by a colleague with whom you often go out for lunch or a friend with whom you go shopping on the weekend, ask them to repay some of your expenses.
For example, a colleague can be asked to pay for lunch with part of the debt, and a friend is unlikely to refuse to take on the purchase of an accessory for your hair. Thus, you will kill two birds with one stone. Remind them about the debt, and partially pay it off.
Tip 8: Look For a Solution Acceptable to All
It happens that right now a person cannot repay a debt for some reason. Then you have to negotiate options that will suit everyone. To show aggression in this case or to express one’s dissatisfaction is fraught with the loss of both duty and a friend. Better to save face and be able to get your money later.
Look for a compromise. If the person is not able to repay the debt in full, you can offer various options, such as repayment in installments, arranging payments in installments. The main thing is that you both agree on an option that will be acceptable to both parties.
Tip 9: Find a Way to Work Off the Debt
If a friend is on a tight budget, but is a professional in his field, you can ask him for a favor on account of his debt.
If he’s great at doing renovations, ask him to install interior doors or help insulate the walls. A designer can be asked to create a beautiful logo to advertise your business, and a massage therapist can give a massage course.
Almost every person has his own talent or skill, thanks to which he will be able to repay a debt without returning the money.
Tip 10: Consider Bartering
When a friend’s finances is down, you can offer him a barter option if it is convenient and acceptable to both parties. Perhaps a friend will gladly agree to remove the “moral burden” by giving you a part of what he does not need himself, but you need.
You can ask gardeners for part of the harvest, and take a debt from a farmer with a couple of dozen eggs or fresh meat. In any case, barter should be equivalent to the amount that the person borrowed. Only in this case, the agreements will make both parties happy.
Tip 11: Ask an Intermediary to Remind About a Debt
If the topic of debt repayment is painful for you and you don’t have the strength or desire to go talk with the debtor, it may be the best solution to involve an intermediary. They can be a close friend or a mutual friend.
When several people know about a debt, especially from a close circle, this can begin to put pressure on the debtor and he will find a way to return what he has borrowed.